In a child custody battle in the UK family courts, the question of who usually ‘wins’ will depend on the judge’s assessment of the best interests of the child. Importantly, the judge will never favour the mother or father in a child custody battle. In practice, contrary to the common belief that the mother usually wins a custody battle, either parent can become the primary custodian of the child if they play an equal or central role in the child’s upbringing.
There are four types of child custody (child arrangement) in the UK:
- Legal custody – Legal custody allows a parent to make decisions regarding their child’s health, welfare, living arrangements, religion and education – this can be joint or sole legal custody.
- Physical custody – Physical custody determines with whom the child will live on a daily basis – again, this can be joint or sole physical custody.
- Full or sole custody – Sole custody (or full custody) means that one parent has both physical and legal custody of their child. However, under the law in England and Wales, it is more normal for both parents to have equal custody rights.
- Joint custody – Joint custody means that both parents have legal and/or physical custody of their child.
When deciding on the type of custody to award, the judge will focus primarily on the best interests of the child. This includes looking at the background, conduct, and temperament of each parent and the physical, financial and emotional needs of the child.
In the UK, a child custody battle typically takes between 10 to 12 months. However, this may take longer (up to 2 years) in the most complex cases. According to recent UK court data1, between July and September 2024, private law cases under the Children Act took an average of 41 weeks to reach a final order, down from 3 weeks in the same period in 2023.
What can be used against you in a custody battle
Various factors are often used against a parent in a custody battle, including:
- Lack of consistent parenting
- Speaking negatively to the child about their other parent
- Parental alienation
- Alcohol misuse or drug abuse
- Lack of cooperation with the court
- Ignoring court orders such as denying child visitation
- Not attending court hearings
Lack of consistent parenting
The reality is that a father or mother can lose a custody battle as a result of inconsistent parenting. The courts tend to favour parents who can offer more steady parenting for their children. Consistent parenting is characterised by providing a stable environment, availability, reliability, and responsibility. For example, a parent who routinely fails to pick up their child from school, forgets medical appointments, and does not provide nutritious food each day may be at risk of losing custody of their child.
Speaking negatively to the child about their other parent
Speaking negatively to your child about their other parent can be used against you in a custody battle. This can be deeply upsetting and confusing for children. As such, it is important to avoid involving your child in disputes with your ex-partner.
Parental alienation
A father or mother can lose a custody battle if they deliberately limit contact and keep their child away from their other parent. Other examples of parental alienation include not keeping the other parent informed of important information relating to the child or trying to harm the relationship of the child with their other parent.
Alcohol misuse or drug abuse
Prior alcohol or drug misuse may not necessarily cause a father or mother to lose a custody battle as long as they are honest and open about what happened and they have taken substantial steps to stop their misuse.
Lack of cooperation with the court
Not cooperating with the family court can harm a parent’s chance of winning a custody battle in the UK. This is why it is so important to work with the court, meet any deadlines, provide any information requested, and be respectful at all times.
Ignoring court orders such as denying child visitation
Ignoring the court’s orders is a red flag for the family courts. If one parent denies child visitation to the other parent in accordance with the instructions of the court, they are less likely to be awarded custody of their child.
Not attending court hearings
Not attending court hearings is also a red flag for the family courts. If one parent routinely attends court on time and the other does not, this will have a large bearing on who they award custody to.
Tips on how to win a custody battle
There are several tips that you can use to win a custody battle as a mother or a father, including:
- Demonstrating your ability and willingness to meet a child’s needs
- Providing strong evidence and documentation
- Having a long-term child arrangement plan
- Clear communication and cooperation
- Mediation
- Using an experienced family law solicitor
Demonstrating your ability and willingness to meet your child’s needs
One of the main ways to win a custody battle as a mother or a father is by showing what you have already done and what you will do to meet the needs of your child. For example, if you have purchased or rented a new home and decorated a bedroom for your child, this demonstrates that you can provide suitable shelter. Likewise, ensuring that you have a reliable source of income or even seeking promotion sends a strong signal that you can meet their financial needs.
Providing strong evidence and documentation
By getting organised and collating any relevant evidence and documents into a folder, you can significantly improve your chances of winning a custody battle. This will show the judge that you are serious about your intentions to look after your child and that you have the necessary information to hand if and when it is needed.
Having a long-term child arrangement plan
By taking control of the situation and proactively drawing up a long-term child arrangement plan with the other parent, you can demonstrate your suitability to have custody of your child. The child arrangement plan should set out clearly where they live when they spend time with each parent, when and what other types of contact may take place (e.g. phone calls).
Clear communication and cooperation
The courts will always favour those who cooperate with them. Clear, honest, respectful, and open communication and cooperation between the court, your legal representative, and the child’s other parent are other important ways to win a custody battle as a mother or a father.
Mediation
Being open to mediation as a means of resolving any custody-related issues with your ex-partner is another factor that the courts will take into account. Openness and involvement in mediation suggest that you are serious about finding a child custody solution that is in the best interests of everyone concerned. Not cooperating in mediation, on the other hand, may be viewed as a red flag by the judge.
Using an experienced family law solicitor
Finally, you can significantly swing the odds in your favour of winning custody of your child by instructing the services of a trusted and experienced family law solicitor. Engage a family law solicitor who will guide you through the child custody process, recommend the best course of action, advise you on how you can enhance your chances of gaining custody of your child, and represent you in court. Most of all, you can relax in the knowledge that your solicitor has your matter in hand and will do everything they can to secure the custody arrangements you are seeking.
References
1 GOV.UK: Family Court Statistics Quarterly; July to September 2024
